@thearmag3ddon here with yet Another Movie Review that You Didn’t Ask For:
Funny thing about the Transformers, they’ve never actually made sense to me. Like, ever. You just have to kind of roll with the premise I GUESS and accept that there’s a planet of robots that transform into vehicles as a way of life, but, like, why? This has always bothered me, but I never let myself really think about it too much. But like, the part where they crash into a mountain that no one finds for a million years, and then they get pieced back together using vehicles from the present day, that totally makes sense in a comic book, cartoon, fantasy kind of way. But being able to already transform into vehicles previously on Cybertron, where there was no one around to drive or fly them in the first place and no reason to do so…and a matter of fact, the Gobots’ origin actually makes more sense. Which is saying a lot because nature, uhhhhh, chose the Gobots for extinction, yet in the end, the Transformers are still superior.
This has nothing to do with my review, but I had to get it out. And to all my creators out there, let this be a lesson: don’t let the lack of story logic stop you. It can make something awesome that looks cool, you can make millions. Maybe even billions.
But anyway enough of these musings and burying the lead.
Okay, are you ready because… Oh my god.
Transformers One is hands down one of the best animated non-Disney/Pixar films not only this year but in the last few years. By now, if you read or listen to my reviews, you know I’m really big on heart in stories. And boy, does this movie have it—times a trillion. It starts off small, light, and breezy, but almost immediately catapults you into multiple scenarios that build one on top of the other, increasing in threat and seriousness until we reach a crescendo that is unmatched in almost any animated action-adventure movie out there. In some ways, it reminded me a bit of one of my favorite Marvel-related properties, X-Men: First Class, which nailed that “friends closer than brothers whose paths diverge through tragedy” thing. Yes, I’m giving you a few shades of Shakespeare here, and while Hamlet it is not, it’s a story that takes the time to make you supremely invested in its main characters, then tosses them—and you—through the wringer as they navigate their way through the mayhem.
One of the things I loved about this movie was that it was packed with action, but not just for action’s sake. This was actually something that Deadpool and Wolverine “failed” at, as while the movie was entertaining, there was a definite sense of the gratuitous inclusion of action simply to fill a quota or spreadsheet, like “ok time for another fight” and frequently those segments didn’t serve to move the story forward. Here in Transformers One, every single action sequence was tied directly to a goal our characters wanted to achieve, and their success or failure in these moments directly built them up or tore them down. That’s the best kind of action to have. You are invested fully and emotionally in the outcome, while it also does a great job of mixing in humor with peril as well.
You may have seen or heard me going on and on about how I don’t like prequels, but the ones that I do like have a certain way of engaging me, and this movie does that. We already know where these characters are meant to end up, so it’s the story’s job to set us down in a scenario where it’s hard to imagine how they could possibly get to what we already know. This prequel nails it, and by the end, I almost wanted to cry. I’m not saying it’s high drama of the highest order, but man, I really felt connected to their journeys. So when it rolled out—no pun intended—the way it did, I felt it inside rather than just feeling like an observer.
The only knock I’d give this movie is that, computer animation-wise, it almost looked like it was made-for-TV in a ’90s setting. Maybe that was a choice, and that’s fine because the story is the real star here. And it still works, and was never a distraction, but if I’m too non-critical in these things, someone will come after me. But yeah, I totally get that a movie being pre-hyped before you get a chance to see it often sets you up for a letdown, but I think you might dodge that bullet this time. The movie proves itself, scene by scene, starting small and earning every moment of those last few minutes.
I’ve seen some comments about how the marketing for this movie was a big miss, and I have to agree. It’s like they weren’t confident in the movie itself, so they gave you Chris Hemsworth and Keegan-Michael Key in the flesh, without really telling you anything about the story, just like, “HEY! THEY’RE IN IT SO YOU MUST GO!” Or the trailers just focused on the action—which, like I said, was really cool—but this movie is actually a character piece. The action, without context, could easily come off as just another cynical remake cash grab.
In the end, Transformers One is exactly the movie I would have loved in the ’80s… hell, the 90s, 2007 and instead of all those Michael Bay Productions which…why does Optimus Prime look all sharp like that? The extreme era was over by the mid-90s Mr. Bay, which ironically is where you peaked so I guess it’s fitting. The best part of this movie is that I don’t think this is just a Transformers inside baseball experience. It’s a solid story that’s actually a tale as old as time. It’s Gilgamesh and Enkidu, retold with transforming robots.
If you can see it in theaters, do it, stat. If you watch it at home, you’ll probably love it too. But yes… for at least a few hours, I no longer felt dead inside. Check your cynicism at the door if you think you’re too cool for Cybertron School. There might be a tendency for you to reject it out of hand because…Transformers, but I’d confidently put this movie in the category of fun for everyone.
Even old dudes that don’t understand why a race of robots needs to turn into cars when there are no people.
For the first time in a long, long time watching a movie, I feel so very alive.
I give Transformers One, 5 Key and Peele A-Arons out of 5.
Until the next review that you didn’t ask for, @thearmag3ddon signing off.